TATTOO

George and Lynne are in the garden where George is applying suntan lotion to Lynne's back. Lynne tells George that she once thought about getting a tattoo. After George asks what kind, Lynne tells him it would be the name of her favourite sexy man. George ask if she didn't end up up getting it and Lynne replies that she didn't because she couldn't decide on Brad Pitt or Johnny Depp.

Lynne has started this conversation about tattoos. This is probably because she has been reading a popular music magazine and has seen rock stars with tattoos. When George asks what kind of tattoo, surely he means what would you have done rather than what kind? Are there different types of tattoo? It's just hot ink under the skin. This is of course unless Lynne has discovered the tattoos where something else is placed under the skin to give it a 3D feel. The tattoo parlour in Wimbledon must be state of the art. No biro, needle and candle here.

'What kind?' is not the only stupid question George asks. He asks Lynne if she went through with it. Has he not been married to her for 10 years? Does he not know if she has a tattoo or not? You may understand it if Lynne was a shy retiring woman who got changed in the bathroom and only copulated under cover of darkness, but this is Lynne we are talking about. She's more often naked than not. George just doesn't pay enough attention to his wife. This conversation might be loaded by Lynne to see if has noticed she doesn't have a tattoo and George has fallen for it.

Brad Pitt's name has come up again. This local Brad Pitt from Wimbledon (or the young exchange student) is still on Lynne's mind. Johnny Depp, however, we have never heard of. Being 20 in 1983, this could be the same Johnny Depp but here is a more viable explanation. Brad Pitt and Johnny Depp are the names of the two competing tattoo artists in Wimbledon. They are both highly regarded and both came up with original designs to ink on Lynne's body, but unfortunately Lynne decided she didn't want to hurt either of their feelings so she opted out of the tattoo. Since then both tattoo parlours have been shut down due to health and safety violations, so Lynne was quite lucky. Hepatitis was just around the corner.