Thursday, December 24, 2009

CAROL SINGING

George and Lynne are out carol singing. When they get back, Lynne is cold but tells George that she had fun and now she needs a hot bath. George says that he enjoys carol singing but it's not a patch on Lynne's singing.

George and Lynne are definitely the youngest people in the carol singing troupe. Is this a whim that they started this year or is it a regular occurrence? Do George and Lynne go to choir practice at the church each week? It is certainly not inconceivable. If Lynne is feeling slightly uncomfortable about 30 years younger than anyone else, she is not showing it as she is doing it for George. Just look at how much he is enjoying it! He has his eyes closed and is really throwing everything into this particular carol. It was George's idea to join the choir.

George is in need of a new winter coat. He has been wearing that same blue wind cheater all year. Everyone else is wearing a heavy winter coat and George thinks he can beat the cold just with the addition of a scarf. That scarf isn't really going to make much difference with it hanging out like that. He really needs to tuck it inside his jacket to create that extra layer he so needs. George should be going to the sales with Lynne after Christmas.

George says he enjoys carol singing, as we have seen from his expression. He then says it's not a patch on Lynne's singing. He has been standing next to Lynne for the past hour singing. You would think that he would have time between songs to turn to Lynne and comment on how lovely her voice is. Oh should that be how much better her singing is. It was not even one month ago that George was recoiling in horror at Lynne's singing. It now seems that Lynne took that advice on board and has been having singing lessons. Either that or it really was the smell of the bathroom that made George gag. Maybe that is why he is still keeping his distance from that foul smelling room.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

MISTLETOE

George and Lynne are out shopping buying Christmas decorations. Lynne says that Christmas wouldn't be the same without holly. George adds that mistletoe is equally important. He then decides to try it out and kisses Lynne.

Christmas shopping may be over for George and Lynne but the decorations still need to be purchased. This trip to the shops has happened the day after the previous present buying because George is wearing a rust coloured suit rather than the blue wind cheater he wore previously. This means that Lynne was wrapping the presents at home when George was at work and then had a sudden panic as she looked around to see her bare house. She immediately called George and demand that they go to the shops after work, or dragged him out at lunch time for a last minute decoration buying spree. George's boss must be on her Christmas holiday already.

Lynne likes holly and is weighing which of the two sprigs is the best. Is she only planning on buying one sprig? Their house will not look very festive with just one sprig of holly on the mantlepiece, so George is right to buy some mistletoe to add to the festive feel of the house.

The reason that they are only buying one sprig of each is that it's so expensive. Lynne hands over at least two notes to the shop keeper. These could be two one pound notes as the pound coin wasn't introduced until 1983, but it could be two five pound notes, or most likely one five pound note and one one pound note. £6 for holly and mistletoe is very steep. The shop keeper must be taking advantage of the last minute rush to buy decorations that he has seen over the last few days and jacked his prices. That said, even his cold money grabbing heart is thawed by the affection between George and Lynne. They still won't be able to afford one of his trees though.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

CHRISTMAS SHOPPING

George and Lynne are out Christmas shopping. Lynne comments that she thinks Christmas is wonderful, to which George only half agrees. George puts the shopping in the boot of the car and is glad that the Christmas shopping is done for another year. Lynne says that they have the New Year sales to look forward to.

George is a gentleman. After the furore with the breakfast cereal, he has offered to accompany Lynne to the shops this time. Christmas shopping is a joint venture in their household so the presents have to come from both of them. George has the right to veto any purchase that they will put their names to. However, Lynne will go to the shops on her own to buy George's present but she will come back with four dresses and a hundred weight of non-descript perfume.

How many people do George and Lynne buying presents for? There's Sammy and 'Mantha obviously, but there must be more if George lets out an audible sigh at the end of the shopping trip. This must have been a long trip. There are many friends and distant relatives that George and Lynne have been seen with over the last few months, but who is to receive the large black and yellow box? It certainly is the largest and most conspicuous present of the shopping trip and whoever gets it will be very happy.

The contents of the yellow and black box is also a mystery. With Sammy and 'Mantha being their closest friends it will most likely be one of them. Sammy needs to clean up so it could be a chest expander for his new regime of fitness and abstinence, but that would most likely come in a box with a picture of it on the front. So the box must be for 'Mantha. A box like that must contain a pair of boots. Lynne is keen to get 'Mantha into the rock music that she has embraced and also secretly blames her for the unceremonious ejection from the club. With these boots they can re-enter the club with their heads held high, and finally talk to some guys.

Monday, December 21, 2009

BREAKFAST CEREAL

Lynne comes through the door having been shopping. She tells George that a new breakfast cereal was on special offer so she bought a dozen boxes. George asks whether this will help her lose weight. Lynne says it already has as she lost three pounds just carrying the boxes home.

George's face shows shock when Lynne comes through the door. This is because he asked Lynne to pop out and get something nice for dinner and she has come back with 12 boxes of cereal. What was she thinking? Lynne must be a sucker for a deal. George should know this and not send her to big supermarkets. There's a deal on every aisle. George is lucky she didn't buy 25 bottles of washing up liquid and half a tonne of cat food.

Lynne has lost three pounds carrying the shopping. How does she know this? As far as we can see, she has come through the front door, collapsed on the sofa through exhaustion and thrown the cereal boxes everywhere. The sofa must have built in scales. That is state of the art furniture. By combining these items, Lynne can now know just how much weight her dinner has made her gain. This is surely the reason for Lynne dieting obsession. It really can't help that you constantly know your weight.

Lynne is visibly sweating from her strenuous walk. Her face is red and she is tired. George really should be offering a glass of water to cool Lynne down. Instead he offers her his most recent urine sample. This may be the reason why George could not go to the supermarket. He has been ill and needs to give a urine sample to the doctor. He does not look ill so it might be that he has to have a random drugs test from work and he thinks it is essential to provide a sample immediately, even though it is Saturday. The last thing that Lynne needs right now is George's hot wee in her face.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

TWO GUYS

Lynne and 'Mantha are at a disco. Lynne comments that two guys are giving her and 'Mantha the eye. The two guys start to come over and Lynne remids 'Mantha that they are married. It turns out that the two guys thought that Lynne and 'Mantha were old teachers from school. 'Mantha is not happy.

Lynne is still rocking the Heavy Metal look. She has gone to a young person's discotheque and has deemed this the outfit of choice. This is probably the most suitable occasion for this outfit after the local pub and the beach walk. 'Mantha on the other hand has gone for the shortest skirt imaginable. Once again her earring match her top, thus implying that she has as many earrings as there are colours.

Lynne thinks that the two guys are giving them the eye. This means that they think these two young men are looking at them in a sexy way. They are standing very close to Lynne and 'Mantha which means that they usually wear glasses but have decided not to wear them to the discotheque as wearing glasses suggests you are a mathematician, which is a look they do not want to pass on, even though they are likely to be mathematics students.

The man on the right is wearing a very poorly made Sergio Tacchini shirt, which is quite casual for a fashionable discotheque especially considering Lynne and 'Mantha's outfits. However the most intriguing dress is the man over Lynne's right shoulder at the end. It looks like an old man who is wearing large hooped earrings and two rows of pearls. Have the girls stumbled upon a special club? The sign behind them clearly says 'Rock', but the woman who is between the ladies also looks of age. Perhaps they are there to pick up their son. I'm sure the man in the Sergio Tacchini shirt will be quite embarrassed that his mum and transvestite father have come into the club and not waited in the car.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

BOARD MEETING

George has arrived home from work and Lynne asks him how it was. George tells Lynne that his boss has asked him what he is bringing to the next board meeting. George says he told her he would bring sandwiches and a flask of tea in case it went on as long as usual.

George is wearing a blue suit, a grey shirt and a black and red tie. This is a different outfit to when we last saw George in work mode. Then he was wearing a blue shirt, purple tie and cream trousers, which may have been part of a suit, or may have just been some chinos. The presence of a jacket today suggest that either it is a lot cooler than before or that George had to see some clients. The boss has asked him about the next board meeting so perhaps today wasn't the day of a meeting. We now know that George must own a number of shirts and ties. I would think he owns three suits.

George is very brave. The only time we have seen a glimpse of his boss, she has grabbed an employee by the tie because he was fiddling his expenses. That man was never seen again. She has asked George what he is bringing to the next board meeting. She did not ask because she wanted to know what material items he would bring, but what input he would have in it. She is probably asking this because in the last board meeting George was extremely quiet and when he was asked about this month's figures he stuttered and started sweating. George is now on thin ice. He has to pull his weight and wow the directors in the next board meeting otherwise it could be his last.

The joke that he made won't have gone down well with the boss. She is not impressed with George's current work rate and this won't have helped. George should be putting in extra hours and all he is thinking about is that there should be sandwiches. If he's not careful, he'll be delivering the sandwiches to that board meeting.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

BREAKFAST IN BED

George brings Lynne breakfast in bed for which she is thankful. George then drops the breakfast which makes Lynne unhappy.

Lynne's breakfast consists of some tea and a flower, which is hardly breakfast. This is either down to George's inability to even toast some bread or Lynne thinks that a hearty breakfast will ruin her figure. That is of course if the flower is just for show. That could be Lynne's breakfast.

If George had made toast it may have made less of a mess than the pot of tea. Whatever the breakfast was, Lynne is now right browned off that she has both missed breakfast and is now sitting in a wet bed. The question still remains, what made George trip up? It could be a rug, it could be a loose slipper. The real reason why George tripped is that he stepped on a mouse.

Monday, December 14, 2009

MOUSE

Lynne sees a mouse and screams at George. George says he will get rid of it and Lynne thanks him. She then wonders where the mice keep coming from. George goes to a pet shop to buy another mouse where the proprietor tells George he wishes his wife's legs were like Lynne's.

George is releasing mice into his bedroom purely so he can get a look at his own wife's legs. This seems quite an extravagant plan, especially when she is already wearing exposing negligee. It would be easier for George to see his wife's legs just by being in the house. She's half dressed enough of the time that releasing rodents seems a little over the top. The pet shop owner wishes to see Lynne's legs but really he should be asking George why he has to do this.

Lynne is wondering where the mice keep coming from. She is just thankful for it to be gone, but never once does she think that the rodent problem is getting out of hand and that George should hire an exterminator. How often is he releasing these mice? It seems he is leaving just enough time between mice so that Lynne doesn't hire pest control but also so that George gets all the plaudits for taking care of it. Or does he have one in his pocket waiting for Lynne to wear that particular item of clothing.

George goes to buy another mouse from a pet shop. This means that after every time he 'catches' the mouse, he must kill it, or release it into the wild. He should just keep the one mouse with his fishing gear. Maybe he thinks Lynne will get suspicious when she keeps seeing the same mouse. Lynne is very perceptive so George has to buy a new mouse each time.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

GARDEN NEEDS

Lynne is in the garden. She tells George that the garden needs weeding. She then tells George that the grass needs cutting and that the hedge needs trimming. George runs off saying that the pub needs visiting.

All this time and George and Lynne's garden still needs some work. The idea of getting a gardener must have fallen by the wayside in recent months because of the economic crisis George has been having. Those little luxuries need to be sacrificed and Lynne has agreed that a gardener is a step too far. She may also have had second thoughts after seeing what Lady Blenkinsop's son was doing with their gardener.

George does not want to do this work and so runs to the pub. Does the pub really need visiting? Is he currently bashing out a contract for a potential new owner and is overseeing a survey? Is he in the local darts team in an important semi-final match? Or is it just that George is shirking his responsibilities? It is your garden as well George, although you wouldn't know it.

How close is this pub to George and Lynne's house? George is shouting to Lynne at the end so he must be in earshot of her. Also he must have heard Lynne's cries for horticultural help in order for him to say that. Unless he is emulating Lynne by pausing for 10 minutes before delivering his witty riposte, that pub can be no more that 40 yards from their house. If that is the case, it is odd that we haven't heard of it before. Sammy should be constantly at George's trying to persuade him to go for a quick drink, although saying that, it is now obvious why we never see Sammy round George and Lynne's anymore because he cannot escape the lure of the pub. The name Ferryboat Inn suggests George and Lynne live very close to the river, which would explain the numerous boating trips.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

THREE PEOPLE

Lynne is on the bus with an unnamed friend. The friend tells Lynne that she was right and there are three people in her marriage. As the friend starts crying, Lynne asks her why she thinks that. Her reason is the present her husband bought last week, which is a 3 person bicycle.

Lynne and her friend are on the bus, probably on the top deck. It is busy so that would suggest it is either commuting time or a busy Saturday afternoon. The man at the front is deaf or a doctor. At first glance, one might think he was listening to his ipod, but this being 1982, ipods were not invented, and neither were in-ear ear phones. So in his ears is either a hearing aid, one of the massive ones which is attached to his belt, or a stethoscope. He has a doctor's look about him and perhaps it is a new stethoscope which he is quite proud of. If he was listening to his ipod, it would either be a Radio 4 podcast or Brahms.

Lynne's friend is unhappy, and she has every right to be. Her husband has not only bought a three person bicycle but invited another woman along. This is certainly not an affair he is trying to keep secret. Even though the husband is seeing another woman, he is inviting his wife along too. What is he trying to achieve? Is it because this other woman wears more revealing clothes? Is she a better cycler? Is she a better navigator? Maybe he just likes cycling on a tandem so much but his ability to lead and look where he's going is so poor that he wants someone else to do it. His wife is also pretty bad at these things so it is essential that he invites another woman along.

If Lynne's friend's husband is only using this woman to help with the cycling then she has nothing to worry about. If he starts inviting her on holiday and buys an extra large bed then she should start worrying. Or perhaps if she stops showing up then the friend should start worrying more. He'll want to keep it a secret if the affair escalates, but then he's more likely to cycle into a ditch.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

SAILING

George and Lynne are sailing in the rain. Lynne is complaining about her hair and make-up and that she is soaked. George retorts that Lynne said she'd love to go sailing. Lynne explains that she thought George meant sailing into the sunset.

George is being very reckless here. I'm not sure who is more to blame; George for going out in that weather or the coastguard for letting him go out in that weather. George would have to be a very experienced sailor to go out in such choppy waters but surely an experienced sailor wouldn't go out in those waters.

If that wasn't bad enough, he's taking Lynne who has never even been sailing before. It would have been a lot easier to take Lynne out on her maiden voyage on a nice sunny day. Although Lynne's comment is a little bit silly, she has a point. Let her get a few trips under her belt before subjecting her to rain.

Lynne wanted to sail into the sunset, but she must know that it really isn't possible. The appearance of sailing into the sunset is only really seen by those on the shore watching a boat sail towards the horizon. When you're actually in the boat you will never reach the horizon, the sun will set and you'll be left in the dark a long way from shore. Lynne has been watching one too many romantic films.

Monday, December 7, 2009

TONING

Lynne is in the shower singing and George does not look happy. When she comes out of the shower, Lynne asks George if he thinks her body needs toning. George replies that it is perfect but tells her that her voice could use some tuning. Lynne does not look happy.

Lynne likes to sing in the shower. Even though she has dabbled in the heavy metal scene, her song of choice is a simple melody. Perhaps it is Hey Jude. Whatever it is, George feels as though he is listening to a cat dying. Either that or he is utterly disgusted at the sight of Lynne washing.

When Lynne gets out of the shower she reaches for a towel. It is the same colour as the one which George is holding earlier, but that does not necessarily mean it is the same towel. People sometimes buy towels in a set which means they have more than one towel of the same colour and size. It is likely that there are some hand towels and flannels which are also that shade of pink too. But it could be the same towel. It could be that Lynne's singing was out of range until George thoughtfully came into the bathroom to put down a towel that had just come out of the dryer. It is only now that he has heard the disgrace that is Lynne's singing voice.

Lynne reaches for a towel but she does not seem remotely wet. Her hair is impeccable and there are no drops of water on her. The lines in the first panel suggest that water is inside the shower area, but the same shading is on the bathroom mirror. This may just be suggesting that George and Lynne's bathroom is in dire need of a clean. So Lynne has been just standing in the shower for the last ten minutes pretending to wash. Not only is the bathroom in need of a wash, but so is Lynne. How long has she been doing this? It might not even be Lynne's singing that is causing George's grimace, but the smell when he has entered the bathroom.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

FERTILE IMAGINATION

George is at work. An unnamed colleague is knocking on the boss's door saying that the boss wants to talk to him. When George enquires what it is about the colleague replies that it is about his fertile imagination. George thinks that this is a good thing but the colleague explains that it is not when it comes to his expenses.

What an interesting insight into George's office life. In George's office he wears a tie, as does his colleague, and it is warm/stressful enough for both of them to have started to roll up their sleeves. They come in in jackets but when the going gets tough, they start to roll up their sleeves. It also helps not to get ink on their sleeves when they are writing out contracts.

This colleague is worried. He should be worried. Even if he hadn't fiddled his expenses he'd be on his way out anyway. Look at him, he's a grandad! We don't need dinosaurs like him in the Wimbledon property lawyer business. It's a cut throat industry and is no place for old timers like him. If he's lucky he'll get a pay off and a good pension.

The boss is THE BOSS and has it on the door. No one knows the boss' name but the boss is feared and revered in equal measure. The Boss is also.... a woman!! Yes, look at the arm in the last frame. It is hard yet feminine. It has two gold bracelets and and shows bare flesh. This is big news for a female boss in 1982. What with George being so attractive, and such a good property lawyer, I wouldn't be surprised if she hasn't made some advances during a late evening slog. Of course George refused and The Boss admired his integrity and promoted him. The Boss is played by Cherie Lunghi.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

INTERESTING MARRIAGE

Lynne is talking to a vicar. She asks him about the interesting marriage she heard that he performed last week. The vicar confirms that it was Tim and Tina that told him they would be marrying in pink but he didn't quite realise what they meant, which was that they were getting married in the nude.

Lynne is leaning provocatively over that altar and the vicar doesn't look amused. If she's not careful, her ample bosom will knock over the cross and candle. Has Lynne just popped in for a chat with the vicar? Is she there for confession and decided to stay for a chinwag? The circumstances of Lynne's visit to the church today are most intriguing. She may be just on one of her outings and decided to pop in to the church on the off chance that the vicar could confirm the rumour she heard about a naked wedding.

However disgruntled the vicar may be with Lynne's cleavage, he is more than willing to explain the marriage in question. He never actually tells us that they were married in the nude but he never denies it either. He knows that Lynne knows they were married in the nude so it isn't necessary for him to say they were married in the nude, more just to say that he was surprised at what happened that day. It sounds as though it was an interesting day but not one that the vicar would like to draw attention to and he certainly doesn't want the church to start getting a reputation for a place where you can have unusual marriage ceremonies.

Tina and Tim really are attention seekers. You could imagine a nude wedding where everyone who was invited was a naturist but not them. They probably didn't even mention it on the invite but kept it a secret deliberately to shock people. Everyone else who has come to the wedding, and the people we can see look like the parents, are wearing normal wedding attire, as they should. Perhaps they have some naturist friends on the other side of the church who are also in the nude but the official photographer has decided not to capture them.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

SAMMY'S PARTY

George and Lynne have gone over to Sammy and 'Mantha's house. George notices a lot of empty wine bottles in the garden and comes to the assumption that Sammy had a party. Lynne is upset that her and George were not invited. They then notice Sammy in his garden chair still drinking wine and decide that he didn't invite anyone else either.

Sammy's garden is very overgrown, much like we saw before, so he still hasn't hired a gardener. Sammy drinks a lot and his garden is overgrown; he is a lazy drunk. With this information available to George and Lynne, it is surprising that they think that he has had a party. Surely they would think that Sammy has once again forgotten to take his wine bottles to the recycling.

I think that the most interesting point here is that they only mention Sammy. Where is 'Mantha? Have they temporarily separated? I think we would have known about this. Maybe 'Mantha is on a business holiday. Does 'Mantha work? If it was a small holiday we would have assume that she would have asked Lynne. This is probably the reason why Lynne feels so disgruntled. She has been neglected by both 'Mantha and Sammy in the space of two days. How demoralising. She, and we, had no idea 'Mantha had any other friends.

Sammy has not had a party. He has merely been drinking all night. Who knows when he started but he looks asleep now and there are 3 empty bottles of red wine, 2 empty bottles of white wine and one empty clear bottle, which may or may not have previously contained whiskey. That is quite a lot of alcohol. It's no wonder he's tired. It all fits together now. 'Mantha has gone away, something which Lynne is not too happy about, and has asked George and Lynne to check on Sammy to make sure he is eating healthily. They go round on Sunday morning and then we see this scene. They throw Sammy in a cold bath to wake him up and then feed him a full english breakfast. They help him clear up to hide all evidence because he's not really meant to be drinking at the moment. What nice friends Sammy has.