LOVE RAT

George and Lynne are having dinner. George introduces a man to Lynne. The man says it is a pleasure and calls Lynne a lovely lady. Lynne tells George that she thinks he's a gentleman. George disagrees and tells Lynne that he is known as a real love rat. Lynne asks George whether he loves them and leaves them. George tells her it is worse than that as he loves them and leaves them with the bill.

George and Lynne have picked a restaurant that unfortunately is close to the scene of a major crime. The patrons by the window are bathed in blue light, most likely from a police cars stationed right outside. It is unlikely that the restaurant itself is the crime scene, but it can't be good for business to have all those police cars outside.

George is very two faced with his friend. He is more than happy to introduce him to Lynne but then as soon as his back is turned he starts to bad mouth him. George has his reasons but he may also be taking umbrage to his friend's very small beard. He doesn't trust anyone who works that hard on facial hair. He respects a bushy beard or moustache, like Sammy's.

The man has walked out on his date, leaving her with the bill. These truly are the actions of a rogue. The woman looks utterly perplexed and this will soon turn to anger. Her first thought is to report this to the policemen who are still outside. However, even though the man's actions are far from honourable, they are not illegal. The police will offer their sympathies and, having heard the description of him, will advise her to, in future, keep away from men with tiny beards.

NEED TO ECONOMISE

Lynne is on the phone. She tells the person on the line that George has said that they need to economise, which Lynne has agreed to. The person on the line tells Lynne that that shows her which side her bread is buttered on. Lynne says that is neither right now so that they can save money.

After yesterday's shopping trip, Lynne liked 'Mantha's underwear so much that she bought herself the same set. Even though George has told her about their financial worries, once more she has spent money on clothes. Underwear is essential though, so maybe George will let this one go.

Whoever is on phone to Lynne is trying to diplomatic on which side to take. This person is probably friends with both George and Lynne so would not want to upset anyone. Lynne is told that her decision shows which side her bread is buttered on, meaning that Lynne is loyal and respectful to George. Had Lynne disagreed with George, the response would have been the same. This person doesn't care about Lynne's problems as they have their own problems. This person is probably 'Mantha.

What a coincidence that Lynne is actually eating bread at this time. Plain white bread. George's first rule of economising is always that spreads and condiments are surplus to requirements. These weekends away won't pay for themselves if they insist on frittering away their money on such luxuries as butter and ketchup. Out goes the marmite, jam and salad cream. If things get worse, sugar and eggs will be the next to go.

TOO MANY CLOTHES

Lynne and 'Mantha are in their underwear. Lynne tells 'Mantha that George has warned her that she has far too many clothes. 'Mantha asks Lynne how she managed to talk him round to which Lynne replies that she took some off.

Lynne and 'Mantha are in their underwear which means they are getting changed for some reason. There are clothes hanging up so we must assume that they are in a clothes shop. This would explain why 'Mantha is so shocked. She has been told that George has given Lynne an ultimatum about her shopping and here she is trying on new clothes. 'Mantha just has to know how Lynne got out of this one.

'Mantha has today matched her earrings with her underwear. Her outfit may also be blue but it does appear that 'Mantha has foreseen standing in her underwear in front of people so has either decided to go with the blue earrings to match her underwear or decided on the blue underwear because she knew she was going to wear her blue outfit, and therefore the blue earrings. Dressing must be a bind for 'Mantha.

George actually warned Lynne that she was wearing too many clothes because it was an unseasonably warm day. Lynne was about to go out wearing shirt, polo neck, cardigan and jacket. George showed Lynne the weather forecast, which read 21 degrees and sunny. Lynne rightly removed some items and now feels a lot more comfortable than she would have done. She is in the shop to add to her winter wardrobe, which she found this morning was woefully unfashionable.

PUSH THE BOAT OUT

George and Lynne are walking along the river. Lynne tells George that she heard that Ted and Tina really pushed the boat out for their wedding anniversary. She then adds the unfortunately it sank as they both see a capsized rowing boat.

George and Lynne live by the river. We know this because they have been boating a number of times and their local pub is called the Ferryboat Inn which implies it is in the vicinity of water. Those facts mean it is not peculiar that they would be walking by the river. The only peculiar thing here is George's jumper: a garment we have never seen before.

George has undoubtedly assumed that Lynne has used the phrase 'pushed the boat out' to mean that Ted and Tina spent a lot of money on a day they could remember for a while. Perhaps it was a landmark anniversary for them. She has however meant that they did actually push a boat on to the river for their anniversary. She thought that prefixing the phrase with the word 'really' would lead George to understand that she wasn't talking figuratively. She should have used the word 'literally' to properly convey her message.

We come across a boat sinking. Are we to assume that this is Ted and Tina's boat? The water has got decidedly choppy at this part of the river. It was not the best place for a novice to go rowing. With the boat still sinking, it may mean that Ted and Tina have recently been here. Herein lies the tragedy of the walk; George and Lynne have gone to the place where Ted and Tina drowned to pay their respects. They look surprised as they didn't expect such a vivid reminder of the accident. Then again, they aren't laying down any flowers so their excursion is fuelled more by morbid intrigue than by mourning.

PILLOW TALK

George and Lynne are in their bedroom. Lynne gets George's attention and then throws a pillow at him for not bringing her tea in bed. George guesses that that is what you call pillow talk.

This must be the morning for George and Lynne. George is brushing his hair and Lynne wants tea; if this was evening it would be a strange ritual. As George is brushing his hair then we can also assume he has had his shower and is just about to get dressed.

Lynne's ire comes from the absence of tea. She is extremely ratty until she has had her morning fix. She throws the pillow with such venom that it causes George to drop his brush. George is lucky that the pillow is the first thing that Lynne could grab. If it was the alarm clock, he could be seriously hurt. To avoid further injuries, George should invest in a teasmaid.

On closer inspection, George is still wearing his pyjama bottoms. Has he even had his shower? Where has been this time? Lynne expected tea so perhaps George has been downstairs. His alibi is the hair brush that he holds, but he'll have to shower before he leaves the house. George has been downstairs making an important phone call that he wants to keep secret from Lynne and, more importantly, us.

TAMSIN

George and Lynne are out and about. Lynne spots Tamsin and says that she's always going topless. The next day Lynne spots Tamsin again and says she is topless as usual. George is surprised that Tamsin would be topless in the high street but she does in fact have the top down in her sports car.

Tamsin is topless in her garden which doesn't seem to bother George and Lynne. She does however seem to be topless in her front garden which is in full view of the general public as George and Lynne have walked right past her. If this is Tamsin's back garden, then George and Lynne may be trespassing her neighbour's garden. The neighbour in question might be a little confused about who to call the police on here.

The next day George and Lynne are wearing exactly the same clothes as the day before. Did they feel that these clothes weren't dirty? If it is warm enough for Tamsin to go topless then you would think that their clothes would have got a little sweaty and dirty as George and Lynne climbed over the fence to get into this person's garden, especially as both George and Lynne are wearing white trousers.

Lynne says that Tamsin is topless in her sports car. This is not technically true. In fact, she has the top down on her sports car; that is, her sports car is topless, not her. George has looked round to see Tamsin topless in her car but will be disappointed. George is also surprised that Tamsin would be topless in the high street but doesn't bat an eyelid that she was topless in the full view of the public in her street. Double standards there George, and for Lynne too for sneering at Tamsin initially. Hypocrites.

TRAFFIC CONTROL

George and Lynne are out and about. George says that they will never get across the road. Lynne proclaims that it has turned really warm now and starts to take off her coat. She bends over and tells George to have faith. George thinks that that is one way of traffic control.

George and Lynne are trying to cross a road. From this distance they look like they are on their way to a fancy dress party, the theme being vicars and brides. The road they are trying to cross looks very strange. They have got a third of the way across. The next stage does look busy and then after that there is a large space. If they can just get across this bit they will be plain sailing to finish their journey to the party.

As we get closer, we can see that Lynne is not dressed as a bride but is wearing her underwear under a coat. The party must be themed as vicars and tarts. Lynne didn't want to be embarrassed walking to the party in her underwear so has worn a coat over the top. The tension and stress of being late for the party due to this busy road has caused Lynne to get a bit hot so she takes her coat off, but she has forgotten her initial embarrassment.

George is still dressed as a vicar but is wearing a pink body warmer over the top of his outfit. Meanwhile Lynne has bent over for some reason. She seems to think it will stop the traffic but due to lots of men turning round to look at Lynne she may actually cause an accident. The men in the cars think they can look at Lynne's behind but not only is she covering it with her coat but George is also in the way. This has left a lot of infuriated men looking at a man dressed as a vicar.