ROCK SOLID

George and Lynne are being interviewed by a woman and a cameraman. Lynne says that their marriage is rock solid. The woman asks them if they think that anything would tempt either of them to stray. George says only sexy reporters and Lynne says handsome cameramen.

This is not London Tonight who are doing this interview. The woman is far too scantily dressed to be a professional reporter and the cameraman would have a larger, more sophisticated camera for a show like that. The reporter has invested in a wireless microphone, so that would suggest she is serious about getting into journalism.

From the nature of the questions, this reporting team may be from a tawdry late night show looking at relationships. It could also be from something similar to That's Life. If that footage was sent back to the studio, Esther Rantzen and the gang would have a field day.

It seems that George and Lynne's marriage isn't as rock solid as they say. However we know that their flirting is always harmless. The real truth is that after a hard day with no television gold, the reporter has bribed George and Lynne to say something racy to give the producers of That's Life some footage they can use. The first rule of reporting, don't be afraid to cook the books. This woman will go far.

INSURANCE

Lynne is with some friends, including 'Mantha. 'Mantha says that Sammy has a cousin in insurance and whatever happens she's okay for life. Another friend says that Dick took out a life policy in her favour the day they were married. Lynne asks Polly what she would get if she lost Percy. Polly replies that she would probably get a Pekinese.

Insurance is the topic of conversation and all the women want to throw in their tuppence worth. The lady who is married to Dick must have had a strange wedding day if he was on the phone to his insurance broker that afternoon. These policies take a long time to sort out so there's a chance he would have missed a good chunk of his own wedding reception. But that man will do anything for his wife.

Polly's husband on the other hand has taken out a very strange insurance policy which states that if he dies, his wife will receive a toy dog of some sort. Whether Polly has the choice of dog is not known but she seems to know which breed she will get. She seems to think that this is a normal policy. Percy on the other hand will be giving all his money to a third party in the event of his death. Maybe, the local dog shelter will be receiving this money and will gladly give his widow a dog of her choosing as a sign of their gratitude. Whichever way you look at it, Polly will be penniless.

TENNER'S WORTH

George comes home from work to find Lynne naked except for a beret. He says that this is the reason why he always looks forward to coming home. Lynne calls him an idiot and tells him to get changed for a night on the town. George hugs Lynne and says he just can't afford it. Lynne asks if they could afford it if she kicks in the mad money she's been saving. She gets her money pot and tells George that there must be a tenner's worth of silver in there. Later George and Lynne are at dinner and George pays for the meal with a credit card.

George likes it when Lynne is naked when he comes home. After last night's dinner out, he'd like a nice evening in tonight, but Lynne is having none of it. She's even willing to blow her savings for another dinner out. George can't be giving her much money if she's only saved £10. Then again, £10 was a lot of money in 1977.

Even before Lynne tells him how much money she has saved, George is down to his briefs and is resigned to going on this dinner. However he has decided not to take the change to the restaurant. It looks like Lynne has given George the money pot for him to bank the next day. George can pay with a credit card which he won't have to pay off until the end of the month, by which time Lynne's change will be safely in George's account. They'll have to wait until Lynne saves up another £10 before they can go to dinner again.

DINNER

George is at the freezer wondering what to have for dinner. His first option is salmon steaks but he decides against it because they had fish for dinner last night. He then thinks about Chicken Kiev. Finally he asks Lynne what he should take out for dinner to which Lynne replies that he should take her out for dinner.

The thought of dinner is really getting to George. Just look at the frown he has on at the thought of salmon steaks. If he's not careful he'll prematurely wrinkle on his forehead. Is dinner really that much of a chore?

What a large freezer George and Lynne have. They are the sort of people who'll make a batch of food and then freeze the portions for ease of cooking at a later date. Perhaps George is the chef and leaves Lynne with a load of meals that she can defrost in her new microwave oven in case George is stuck at work, which is a more regular occurrence these days. Maybe he's pushing for a promotion.

Due to George's late nights at the office, Lynne takes this opportunity to spend some quality time with her husband so suggests they go out for dinner. It's a snap decision as she's not dressed for a dinner out. She knows she'll have to put some more clothes on before they leave. The Chicken Kiev will just have to wait.

GOSSIP

George and Lynne are at home. Lynne says to George that he'll never guess what Mildred has just told her about Maggie and Maurice. George says he won't try to guess and asks Lynne what it was. Lynne says she doesn't like to gossip. George butts in to say that nobody admits to liking to gossip but everyone enjoys it so he asks Lynne about Maggie and Maurice.

Lynne has been out and George has not. She is wearing her Diane Keaton in Annie Hall look which suggests this tale is set in the late 70s, possibly a good 5 years before our usual adventures. George is dressed very casually and certainly wouldn't have been allowed out like that with Lynne as she was dressed so well.

However fashionable Lynne's clothes, she finds them incredibly uncomfortable and has to disrobe as soon as soon as she gets home. Perhaps she has gone with the cheap option and is left with a polyester shirt which is a bit itchy. This maybe before George had become the big wig in the property business, so he couldn't afford to buy her expensive clothes.

It seems we'll never find out about Maggie and Maurice. Lynne knows and George will find out but we are left wanting more. It is inconceivable that Lynne won't tell George because a marriage is based on trust. Of course if George tells someone else and it gets back to Mildred, or even worse Maggie and Maurice, then Lynne will be upset at George for gossiping even though the blame will lie firmly with Lynne. What a quandry she must be in.

PARROT

Lynne is with an unnamed friend. The friend tells Lynne that her parrot used to live on an oil rig. Lynne asks if his language is pretty crude when he talks. Her friend says it is not, but he does tend to gush a bit.

Lynne's friend's parrot used to live on an oil rig. This means that either her husband used to work on an oil rig, or knows someone who did who needed to get rid of a parrot, or the pet shop owner gave the parrot an elaborate back story in order to shift the parrot quickly.

On first glance it seems that Lynne and her friend are attempting to out-pun each other. Actually this is rather a normal conversation. Lynne wonders if this parrot swears, partly because she thinks that many men on an oil rig would swear a lot, but also because she is ill-educated and believes that parrots actually talk rather than mimic humans. Her first assumption would be more correct.

Her friend says that the talking is not a problem, but he does have a discharge problem. She says he gushes, which makes it a strange choice not to keep the parrot in a cage. They have taken him to the vet but all he could do was prescribe some tablets which are difficult to administer to an irate parrot. Perhaps this is why the pet shop owner was so keen to get rid of him.

WEDDING ANNIVERSARY

George and Lynne are at a pub. George notices that Tim is celebrating his wedding anniversary. As Tim kisses the woman he's with, George continues to say that it looks like he's certainly enjoying married life especially with his wife being away. Lynne looks shocked.

It is a lovely day so George and Lynne have gone for a drink in the garden of a pub. This could be the Ferryboat Inn but it is unlikely that Tim would be cheating on his wife in a place where so many people would know him. Wherever they are, Lynne is enjoying a brandy whilst George has opted for a jar of mustard as his aperitif.

George timed his little speech to perfection, revealing the twist at the very end to maximum effect. This means he must know that Tim is having an affair. If it was a shock to him then he may have whispered to Lynne that Tim is kissing someone who isn't his wife, and on his wedding anniversary of all times.

George also knows that this is Tim's wedding anniversary. Either Tim has told him that it is his wedding anniversary soon but his wife's away on business so he's going to meet up with his mistress or George went to Tim's wedding. You would assume that if he went to Tim's wedding then Lynne would have gone too, and therefore know that that is not Tim's wife. The conclusion of all this is that either Tim is flaunting his affair all over the pub or Lynne is so self involved that she can't remember the bride at a wedding.